Where is Home?
by MackDreamer
Summary: All Evelyn and Demetria(Demi) wants is a home where they'll belong in, and maybe even meet their half-brother. But they don't even know him, and have no idea where he is. Meanwhile, Woundwort's troops are getting closer to Watership Down, and Hazel and the others must make a move before its too late. Please R&R!
1. Evelyn

It always amazed me how the sky can turn from a darkened night, into a bright day. Everyday I stan here. Watching as the sky turns purple, then pink, orange, yellow and finally, into white as frith rises from the far away horizons.

Theres a lot of things in this world I don't like, but sunrises have always been a source of comfort for me. Frith comes every morning and goes away every night, but he always comes back. And each time, he paints the sky with yellows and reds that slowly fade into purple and blue. I love these colors, they warm me up in the morning and the air always smells fresh and clean.

I always feel the happiest under the sunrise's colors. But it has to end sometime, and when it does end, I'm left feeling lost and alone.

My past is nothing special. I was born and raised in a burrow under a bridge. The warren was very big, just my parents, eight other males, six other does and three other baby rabbits besides me. All my brothers and sisters died at birth, making me an only child. But my parents weren't originally from the warren, my father use to be a warrior in a warren called Sandleford, and my mother use to be a hutch rabbit and grew up with man. Making her a bit of an outcast among the others.

Its also why my mother fought with other rabbits. She believed that not all man are alike, and didn't consider them an enemy. Unless they carried a gun. My mother told me about man, and what she learned from them. She told me that some of them ride these things called cars and boats and bikes. I'v never seen those things before, but when my mother described them to me, I imagined what they looked like and wondered how man built them.

My father was a different matter. He told me that man can kill us, and hurt us if they wanted to. That they'll do it without mercy or feeling. He only believed that because it was man that destroyed Sandleford. He told me about that place, and the rabbits who lived there. My father left seasons before man destroyed the warren, but he witnessed the destruction when he went to visit the place.

That was only months ago, and things had gotten harder for me. My mother died shortly after having her second litter, and just like me, there was only one baby that survived. My little sister, Demetria. I call her Demi, most of the time while she calls me Lynie. She's the only one who can get away with calling me that. When she was learning how to speak, she couldn't say my name right and just called me Lynie because it was easier then saying Evelyn. But from the start, it was clear Demi would have challenges in her life. She was born with deformed legs and hoped with a limp. She would hunch over when standing, in fear that her legs would somehow tip her over. 'Heavy boned'. Thats what the healers said. That Demi's leg bones are more heavier then they should be. Sometimes I wonder if thats even true.

Demi looks like our father, her fur is lighter then his but its closer to Father's then mine is. She also has his brown eyes, and a tuff of hair on her head that she often pushes to the right side of her face. But she takes after Mother, she's shy, friendly, peaceful and at times, docile. Demi doesn't hang out in crowds, and its hard for her to make friends, but she does get lonely when she sees other children playing together and she's by herself.

I'm a different story, but I'm similar too. I'm more secretive, protective, rebellious, untrusting and cold. But I care very much for small things. Flayrah, flowers, grass, clouds, sunsets, sunrises, dreams. Everything others would take for granite. I'm a dreamer at heart, and I secretly love poetry, singing and stories. But that side of me is the one I only share with Demi. I can only trust her with that side. I have the same light, golden, caramel, brown fur as Mothers, but my chest and stomach and eye markings are the same color as Father's, and I have his tail. My eyes are blue, like Mothers but mine seem darker then hers.

Anyways, months after my mother's death, I was captured by man. He could have killed me. Harmed me in the worst possible way imaginable. But all he did was clip this tag on my ear, and let me go. When I came back to the warren, my father was convinced I was cursed. In fact, the entire warren wanted me gone. To make things worse, that same night, a weasel came and killed and ate everyone in the warren. All except for Demi and I.

They were right about the tag. It _is_ cursed…_I _am cursed.

Ever since that night, Demi and I have been on our own. Going wherever the wind takes us. But we'r not going to stop until we find him. Before I was tagged, Demi and I found out that we weren't Fathers only children. Our father had several children before us and when he went to Sandleford and found dead rabbits there, he found all of them. Except for one. Our half-brother's name is Bigwig. From what we'v been told, we know that he's a warrior, like Father was, and was captain of owsla. I don't really know what that is, but I'm guessing its a group of warriors or something like that. Demi day dreams about Bigwig all the time. She wants nothing more then to be with him, feel his touch, hear his voice and feel safe with him.

I want that too. I want to believe that finding Bigwig will make everything all better, and Demi and I will finally have a home and belong somewhere again. Where I won't be judged by my tag, and where Demi could have friends. I wish for that every night, and I dream about it in my sleep. Everyday, I secretly hope we'll run into him in the forest, and then Demi and I would join his warren.

But in my heart, I know it may not be that way. Bigwig hasn't seen Father for years, and Demi and I never even met him. We don't even know what he looks like! When I think about Bigwig, I imagine a rabbit who looks like my father but looks different then him too. I imagine him being brave and strong, like all warriors. Maybe he's a dreamer too, maybe he watches the sunrise like me…But I also know he may not be anything like I imagine him to be. He could be just like everyone else in our old warren. Judgmental, unreasonable, hateful…He could easily call me a curse, just because of my tag…He might even reject Demi and I as his sisters, just because of my stupid tag!

"Lynie?" I turn my head to look down at Demi. I didn't even notice her. I was so deep in my thoughts, I didn't hear her coming. "Yes?"

"When do we have to go again?" She asked. Demi knows I love the sunrise, so she's always patient with me in the mornings, but she likes to know when its time to go.

I smile at her. "As soon as your ready to climb on my back." I told her. I don't mind carrying her. Demi is capable of hoping on her own, but its hard for her to move her legs that fast, and I'm a fast hopper. Its easier for both of us if I just carry her. She just smiled back. "Ok, I'm ready." She said. I bend down so she can climb on. When Demi is on my back, I start hopping. As the sky turns orange and yellow, I take a deep breath of the fresh, morning air and one thought runs through my mind

_"..Please accept us Bigwig..Your our only hope..Please let us in.." _

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**A/N: Usually, I do stories on the Silverwing TV series, but I love Watership down, and this idea hit me without warning, so I had to start this story before it disappeared forever! XD I'v loved Watership Down since 2006, it is one of my most FAVORITE things! I'v seen the movie, the series, the book series but I haven't read the actual real book. My all time favorite character is Bigwig, I have a Bigwig plush doll that I love with all my heart and I'v wanted to write a story about him for years but couldn't decide on anything until now. This fanfic, is based off the TV series (not the third session, the second one!…How ever, I COULD write something for that session too..) and I'll try to update soon, but I have other stories to work on so it might take a while. (Feel free to look at my other stories if your curious about them!)**

**Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this story and please review! ;D**


	2. Bigwig's guilt

_**BIGWIG'S POV **_

I don't feel good. I haven't felt good in days. I'm not sick, but I don't feel like going on patrol, or training or anything. I don't even feel like eating, the very thought of grass and flayrah makes me nauseous for some reason. All I'v done for three days straight is lie around all day and sleep. It was ok the first day, Hawkbit, Dandelion, and Kehaar were all still recovering from the 'great bee attack' from the last patrol, Pipkin and Fiver were still half asleep, and Hannah was sleep walking most of the time. So I gave the owsla a day off that day, and on the second day, we all overslept, so it was too late to go on patrol.

It was only when I didn't wake up at the crack of dawn, and didn't wake the owsla for patrol, did anyone notice something was wrong with me. Like I said earlier, I'm not sick but I'm not exactly feeling good either. I started feeling like this after a dream I had. The dream wasn't like anything I usually dream of, but it was about something personal. Something I thought I couldn't remember.

In my dream, I was sleeping with my brothers but I kept hearing my parents voices. They were talking about something I couldn't understand. The few words I could make out were: "What about the children?…Should just go…Are you sue we should?…For the best..". I was hardly a youngster then, I heard those words but they didn't make sense to me at the time. The memory of them just disappeared as I grew up.

I was one of ten children at the time. Russell, Almond, Pine, Taint, Juniper and Landon were my older brothers, Sage was my twin brother and Gooseberry and Marion were my younger brothers. I didn't have any sisters, something my mother wanted very much. She wanted to have a baby girl in her family, but it never happened. My parents drifted apart before they could have anymore children.

My father was a warrior, he wasn't in the owsla but he was one of the bravest bucks in Sandleford. He was the hole reason why I wanted to be captain of owsla, even though he wasn't a captain. He was a bold buck, with a thirst for adventure. My mother was more of the peaceful, stay at home type of doe. I think this is why they separated. My father wanted to go on adventures and travel the world, and my mother just wanted to stay at Sandleford and raise a family. So my father left, and I never saw him again.

Sessions later, I became a captain of owsla, like I wanted to be, Sage became a sentry guard, and all my other brothers found mates and had their own children. By the time Fiver had that vision about Sandleford's destruction, I had several nieces and nephews. Too many to name and too many to count! It was obvious to everyone that Sage and I were the introverts of the family. Not insisted in does, and spending most of them time to ourselves. Except for when we were together. But Sage had Father's adventurous side, and he left the warren to go on his own adventures. I haven't seen or heard from him since. I tried to tell my brothers about Fiver's vision, but they won't believe me. They always thought Fiver was insane and never liked him. They also didn't like Hazel, they thought he was trouble. My eight sisters-in-law didn't like them either, and insisted on keeping the children away from Hazel and Fiver. That was the main reason why I didn't talk to any of them much.

To this day, I feel guilt for not forcing them to come with us. If they came with me, they would still be alive. They would have been happy in Watership Down, no elil, no fear. All my nieces and nephews would have more then enough space to play in, and..And maybe they would have changed their minds about Hazel and Fiver. Not just my brothers, but their mates too. I also regret the last conversation I ever had with my family. It was a horrible fight, we yelled and shouted at each other, Anger filled words flying back and forth. It was as if we had all gone mad. I'm just glad none of the children were there to witness it.

Finally, I ran out of that burrow and joined Hazel and the others. That was the last time I ever saw my family. I'll never forgive myself for not telling them that I loved them, and not saying goodbye to the children, but the part I hate the most is, I could have saved my family if I made them come with us. But I didn't. I abandoned my family for the black rabbit of ingle. The only ones who weren't killed in Sandleford were Sage and my father. I don't even know if their still alive. But that doesn't change anything. My other brothers and their mates and children are all dead because I didn't save them.

Since that first dream about my parents, I'v had dreams about them and my brothers. Dreams that give me both happy memories, and painful guilt. The dream I had the next night was about one of my nephews, Cranberry. He was laughing, his eyes were shining, a big smile was on his face. He was happy. He kept saying 'Come on, Uncle Bigwig!' I run after him as he leads me. I don't know where we'r going but he's happy, and I'm happy and I don't question it. But suddenly, the grass under my feet grow long and closes in on me like walls. Walls that threaten to crush me if I don't hurry. I try to get away from the long grass, but I'm trapped in it and I can't get out. I suddenly get scared that Cranberry could be in trapped in the long grass but when I call out to him, the grass gets caught in my mouth and I choke…And then I woke up, still muttering Cranberry's name.

Cranberry and I use to play with each other in my free time, but we never got trapped in grass before. That dream was more like a nightmare, then any good memory.

The last dream was the strangest. In it, I was on patrol with the owsla, and suddenly I hear someone calling me. I don't know who the voice belongs to, or where it came from but as I look for whoever it was that called me, it gets really foggy and I can't see Fiver, or Pipkin, or Kehaar, or Hannah, or Hawkbit or even Dandelion anywhere. But even then, I still hear that voice call me. Suddenly, I see a shadow in the form of a rabbit hoping around. Calling my name. I answer the voice and the rabbit disappears. I don't know why, but I need to find the rabbit. So I call out to him and look for him but as I'm running, I'm going no where.

Then I woke up, covered in sweat. I haven't slept since. I'v had small dreams about Sandleford in my naps but I don't feel like napping anymore. My head hurts every time I wake up from a dream, and I can't stop thinking about the dreams.

Why am I having these dreams? I haven't had dreams like these for months. And even then, I never dreamt about things like these before. I know I should probably tell someone about them, but I don't know who. I certainly can't tell Hawkbit or Dandelion, they'll just think I'm crazy or something. Hannah, Kehaar, Primrose, Blackavar, Strawberry and Clover won't know what I'm talking about, and probably won't understand. "Don't you want to go on patrol?" Asked Hazel's voice. He must have hopped into my burrow when I wasn't listening.

"Not today." I said, shaking my head. When Hazel didn't say anything else, I looked at him. He was sitting next to me, looking at me with concern. "Are you ok, Bigwig?" He asked. I frowned at him, annoyed with his question. "I'm not sick, Hazel." I growled at him. He didn't even blink. "But are you ok?"

My frown slowly dissolves and a deep sigh escapes my throat. "..No..Not really." I say as I sit up. "Whats wrong?" He asked. I hesitate and look down. Should I really tell him? What would he think? That I'v lost my mind? As if reading my mind, Hazel touches my shoulder, making me look at him. "Bigwig, I'm your friend, you can tell me anything and I promise I'll understand." He said, looking at me in the eyes. I sigh again. I can't keep the dreams to myself anymore.

"I'v been having dreams about my family." Hazel raised an eye brow. "Your family? What about them?" He asked. I told him about the one with my parents talking, then the one about Cranberry, and then about the one with the mysterious figure. When I finished, Hazel looked just as baffled as I felt. "You haven't talked about your family ever since Holly came to Watership down, why are you suddenly having dreams about them?" He asked. I shrugged. "Thats what I want to know." I crossed my arms. "But that shadowy figure…I never saw him before, but he knew my name."

Hazel frowns slightly. "You sure it wasn't Sage?" I shook my head. "No. If it was Sage, the figure would have been the same shape as my shadow. It wasn't Sage, it was a total stranger." I told him. I sigh again, remembering Cranberry, and how happy he seemed in the dream. "Its my fault my family is dead, Hazel. If I hadn't left them in Sandleford, they would still be alive…I..I basically _killed_ them-" Hazel surprises me by wrapping his arms around me. Hugging me.

I'm so surprised by this, that it silences me. A more calmer feeling overcomes me, and I suddenly feel better. Why is Hazel hugging me? He never hugged me before-Except for Fiver and Primrose..And I haven't hugged anyone since Sandleford. "Its not your fault, Bigwig. You didn't mean to leave them behind. Please don't blame yourself for their deaths." He said in a comforting voice. I'm surprised by the comfort, but its enough to make my guilt disappear. I wrapped my shaking arms around Hazel and returned the hug. "..Thank you, Hazel.."

Russell, Taint, Gooseberry, Marion, Almond, Pine, Juniper, Landon and their mates were wrong about Hazel. He's _not_ trouble of any kind. He's wise, kind-hearted, clever and brave. I'm glad he's also my best friend.

* * *

When Hazel and I went outside, we saw Fiver laying on the ground and shaking violently. Another vision. "Fiver! What is it?" Hazel ran over to him, as I followed. Fiver was staring straight into the sky, eyes looked onto nothing in particular. "Uhhh…..They come searching for him..They don't know danger awaits them..Run away rabbit, run away! Danger is on its way!" When the vision ended, Fiver shook his head. Shaking from the shock. "What was that one about?" Asked Dandelion. He and Hawkbit had hopped closer.

"Woundworts army is out on patrol, their hunting two rabbits." Said Fiver as he rubbed his head. "So? Whats so special about that? Their always hunting rabbits." Hawkbit retorted.

"Yes but this is different. Those rabbit are looking for Bigwig." I can feel the color drain from my face as Fiver says that. The shadowy figure from my dream appeared in my mind. Calling my name, searching for me. I look out at the horizon beyond Watership down.

Who are those rabbits? And what do they want with me?

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**A/N: I know I gave Bigwig a lot of brothers and nieces and nephews, but then again, rabbits tend to have a lot of babies so I hope that works. And yes I made Hazel and Bigwig have a hug moment, I love friendship hugs X3 You may also notice I changed my usual point of view signal. Usually, I just write the characters name and then 'pov' in uppercase letters and thats it. But I'm trying something new, and I might continue on with that small change.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and please review!**


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